Kissing Jessica Stein & Readings !

First off, I want to talk about the article from CNN.com, "The Mythical 'War on Men'" by Michael Kimmel! This article discussed the killed relationship between the sexes from author Suzanne Venker who is adamant in believing that men are the cause of women's unhappiness. Kimmel writes his piece with the belief that men can be equal partners, coworkers, colleagues, and parents. The final line of Kimmel's article says, "We want it all also- - and the only way we can have it all is to halve it all." This statement utters the simple truth that many of us forget; relationships take two people and regardless of the sex, both people have wants and needs that are capable of being equal if that is what they desire. 

There can be negative stigmas attached to a male and female relationship in that the man doesn't always carry his own weight, or women are meant to be in the kitchen while the men are bringing home the dough and working out in the yard and on their toys, but this is in fact not every scenario. We associate males and females in a way that we were taught from when we were young; the 50's version of the American dream, but news flash, it's almost 2013! 

Although many relationships do fit this stigma, many relationships are successful while being what we may consider "non-traditional." Have you thought of the dad being a stay at home dad? Or the mom bringing home the paycheck? What about a family with no kids at all? Or even more, a same sex relationship? What about a same sex relationship with children? There are so many possibilities to both the heterosexual and homosexual relationships these days that it is almost hard to even put a stigma or stereotype to it. 

I suppose that my thoughts on relationships is that it is possible for both people in a relationship to be happy, if they are both putting in the effort and both offering what each other needs whether its financially, emotionally, or sexually. 

With that in mind, Kissing Jessica Stein is a great way to express how different people need different things in a relationship and that if both people are willing to help the other with their needs then the relationship might dissolve into a friendship or even worse no friendship at all. Helen was a sexually driven person, while Jessica was a confused person who happened to have bad luck in love and decided that maybe, just maybe she wasn't attracted to the opposite sex, but the same sex. Their relationship as Helen puts it is a friendship, they are simply best friends and by their break-up Jessica puts their relationship into perspective by saying to another character that she just wasn't gay enough for Helen. Both of these women brought something to the table, but what they were bringing did not meet what each other needed; therefore, the relationship end, but they were fortunate to remain really close friends. 

Julia Kristeva puts love bluntly in her piece, "In Praise of Love" by stating, "love never dwells in us without burning us." With every love, there is the inevitable chance of hurt--that might not mean the relationship dissolved, but maybe that there was a harsh argument or a disappointment; however, whatever the case may be love brings us this burning sensation. Often times we say we have butterflies or these un-explainable feelings inside our stomach when we think of that special other, but can't it be true that we feel the burning too? Here's the thing, we must take that chance to fall in love because it's natural to desire another person, to want a relationship (maybe even like one listed above), maybe to just step outside of our comfort zone and take an adventurous risk. Without risk there would be know desire; there would be no love. Kristeva sums up my thoughts for today, "Within love, a risk that might otherwise be tragic is accepted, normalized, [and] made fully reassuring." 

Simple Passion

Annie Ernaux's auto-fiction "Simple Passion" has nothing "simple" about it. The chapter read for this week's class brings love and desire further to light, but also explores the idea of obsession. We desire things or people that we want then we fall in love with those things or people. Doesn't it happen that many times a relationship turns into a sort of obsession? Maybe some people would rather refer to it as a routine, but in reality in a relationship we often become obsessed with the other person. Once we commit to someone suddenly all our thoughts somehow return to what that person would think, want, need or do. We are obsessed with looking for that next text, phone call or FaceBook status from our significant other. Some people, take obsession to a whole other level life Anie Ernaux. Ernaux talks about the unbelievable pleasure A brings her sexually, but its more than eroticism attached with Ernaux's feelings. She almost idolizes A, what he wears, how he acts, how he moves or stumbles...its the every little gesture that one might typically overlook. Ernaux is stuck in this time freeze, in my opinion, everything is in slow motion as she waits for Mr. Right to think or feel even a partial of what she feels for him. Why does she wait for this man? She must be able to find someone else or there must be someone else who certainly wants her, but I guess that's just it...we want what we can't have! If he reciprocated the entire time would she still want him? Would the passion be just that simple or would it no longer exist? Ernaux feels the voids in her life by shopping for specialty clothing, items and lingerie with the idea that she will meet this man once more. It is very typical to try and replace voids with material items, but that won't ever actually fill that void completely.

I'll Make Love To You- Boyz II Men

Boyz II Men: I'll Make Love To You

Close your eyes, make a wishAnd blow out the candlelightFor tonight is just your nightWe're gonna celebrate all through the night
Pour the wine, light the fireGirl, your wish is my commandI submit to your demandsI will do anything, girl, you need only ask
I'll make love 2 you like you want me toAnd I'll hold you tight, baby, all through the nightI'll make love 2 you when you want me toAnd I will not let go 'til you tell me to
Girl relax, let's go slowI ain't got nowhere to goI'm just gonna concentrate on youGirl, are you ready? It's gonna be a long night
Throw your clothes on the floorI'm gonna take my clothes off tooI made plans to be with youGirl, whatever you ask me, you know I will do
I'll make love 2 you like you want me toAnd I'll hold you tight, baby, all through the nightI'll make love 2 you when you want me toAnd I will not let go 'til you tell me to
Baby, tonight is your nightAnd I will do you rightJust make a wish on your nightAnything that you askI will give you the love of your life
I'll make love 2 you like you want me to(I'll make love)And I'll hold you tight, baby, all through the night(Hold you tight)I'll make love 2 you when you want me to(I'll make love)And I will not let go 'til you tell me to
I'll make love 2 you like you want me to(I'll make love)And I'll hold you tight, baby, all through the night(Hold you tight)I'll make love 2 you when you want me to(I'll make love)And I will not let go 'til you tell me to
This is not my only favorite love song, but I love this song because it's about a guy pleasing a woman unconditionally.  I think a guy should go out of his way to make his woman feel amazing. I thought of Celestina when listening to this song more recently because the guy would do anything to be with Malibea. Part of healthy love is having the romance alive and this is a good song for a guy who wants to treat his lady right! :) 

Karma: The Bad Girl Part II

Ricardo was an intelligent man, but also very stupid too. He was blinded by the “love” of the Bad Girl. Through thirty some years the Bad Girl had entered and exited Ricardo's life dramatically. The Bad Girl was deserving of no name other than just that, the Bad Girl. She deceitful, cruel, and cold, yet Ricardo loved her. Why did he love her so much? Ricardo loved her because she never loved him the way he loved her; the way he wanted her to love him. Ricardo wanted to win the game, the trophy being that he won't the Bad Girl's love once and for all. At the end of the story Ricardo and the Bad Girl were together in their later years; some might say that he finally won and captured what he had desired his whole life, but I don't see it that way.

The Bad Girl treated people cruelly and believed, like I said last week that happiness could only come from money. She stole, deceived, and betrayed many people. I truly feel that she had no feelings and she certainly could not be remorseful. She was a manipulator which enabled her to be the thief that she was, both of money and of heart. She was always greedy from the beginning of the novel and she was also selfish. She sought out men who would be vulnerable to her lies and open to her fabricated stories of the many lives she lived.

Karma is a powerful term that many people refer to in today's society. We also think of the phrase "what goes around comes around". Karma is what determines a person’s fate. We constantly are made aware of our actions for just this reason. We hope, as humans, that if we do well in return good will be done to us. When we do badly, we often see that our fortune, connections or relationships are not as good as they could be. I would never wish harm or poor health upon any person, in real life or in a book, but as I see it, the cancer determined the fate of her actions.

I also believe that her reasoning in seeing Ricardo at the end was for purely selfish reasons. She knew she destroyed the man, closest in age, who loved her tremendously regardless of all her wrong doings. Ricardo, in my opinion, had much insecurity. At the end, he did take the Bad Girl back, but he knew it wouldn’t be for long; however, this time when she left it would be the last, it would be final. At this point, Ricardo had lost her so many times that this final time would almost be a relief to him.

I don’t feel that Ricardo had very good luck. I think that he was a good person who had been handed a bad deck of cards when it came to the game of love. Everyone has some heartache and pain, but I felt that even when Ricardo tried to rid the Bad Girl of his mind she some how reunited herself with him; whether it was on purpose or by coincidence.

The Honest Truth: "The Bad Girl"

The Bad Girl is a continuation of what we are learning in class about love and desire. The main character Ricardito has dreams of living in France for all is life. These dreams began when he was young and an orphan cared for by his Aunt Alberta. From his young days in Lima to his current days in Paris, Ricardito had love for this mysterious girl; the "Bad Girl". The Bad Girl was known as the Chilean girl, then guerrilla fighter, and then Madam Arnoux. As Madam Arnoux, the Bad Girl lived a suitable lifestyle. She traveled, had a love affair, got to wear fancy clothes, and go to A-list parties. She desired a life of wealth, fancy and fashion. Ricardito loves her from the first day he met her, and every time after that he had a bizarre run in with her just by coincidence. The Bad Girl was a liar and would do anything get ahead no matter the feelings others had to sacrifice. Ricardito never stopped thinking about her and he would tell her all sorts of romantic things yet she would blame him that the reason they weren't married was because he was a coward. In one discussion, the Bad Girl said,  "Happiness, I don't know ad I don't care what it is, Ricardito. What I am sure about is that it isn't the romantic, vulgar thing it is for you. Money gives you security, it protects you, it lets you enjoy life thoroughly and not worry about tomorrow. It's the only happiness you can touch." The concept of money buying happines is something we have briefly touched upon in class, but have not spent a whole lot of time discussing. In the Bad Girls mind, this is the ultimate way to achieve happiness. I believe she knows the difference between happiness and love and she could care less if she loved the man she was with as long as he was wealthy and could lavish and spoil her. She knew she would continue to have love affairs until and even after she found that wealthy companion. Following her brief statement about happiness she said, "I'll never be satisfied with what I have. I'll always want more." This speaks to how humans naturally desire more and more...for if we do not desire we would not live. The Bad Girl is blunt in speaking about such desires. She wants to travel, dress fancy, go to plays and live an extravagant lifestyle all of which Ricardito could not afford. Ricardito desires to care for her in ways that are nowhere similar to the Bad Girl's fantasies. I believe that the Bad Girl is a bad person, an obviously unfaithful person, a liar and a deviant. She doesn't fit the role of a wife, but more of a whore. There is no game of love with her, its a game of money and fortune...Just as it was when she stole Monsieur Arnoux's money out of his Switzerland account and disappeared into the unknown on her next adventure to win big. 

"I Am Love" & "Solaris"

"She's a mirror that reflects part of your mind, you provide the formula."- Gordon

This quote said by Gordon in the movie Solaris brought me back to the story of Narcissus and how he loved what he thought was perfection; his mirrored image. I know that it is common in movies, books and real life to image what we want in life and how we want it. This desire is all a part of our fantasy that we create in our minds of what the perfect life will be and what are perfect relationship will be like. Every day we imagine yet another aspect of our future life and no matter what happens we have the ability to control every change in our fantasy to adjust to our moods, our heartaches, and our happiness. We control the fantasy and no one knows what the fantasy consists of or who is a part of it; no matter how large or small the fantasy is. Calvin, the psychologist in Solaris went to outer space to resolve a mystery that could either benefit human life or have a serious negative impact on human life. Unfortunately Calvin got sucked into the mystery becoming a victim of the unknown. Calvin got caught up in the fantasy. He created the wife he longed to still have, he created her as he remembered her. He wanted to fix what he could leading up to her suicide. Gordon, also a victim at one point, realized that the figures were the creation of the mind along with some rare scientific composition. Calvin is a great example of how easy it is to get lost in the fantasy.  I think as humans it so easy to forget our reality. We also have a hard time moving on and accepting loss. Calvin suffered from this, I believe that he blamed himself for his wife's suicide and he refused to move on or let go. Ultimately, her actions were her decision not Calvin's. 
 "I Am Love" was story of the ultimate desire that led to fatal ends. Emma changed and began to love Antonio. Emma's want for Antonio, in my opinion, grew through his cooking. Antonio, a talented chef, prepared many intimate meals for smalls dinners as well as dinner parties for his friend Edo; Emma's son. Emma committed adultery, but in the end had no regrets even though she lost her son. One aspect of the film I found interesting was at the end when Betta watched Emma leave for good with tears in her eyes. I think Betta was happy for her that she was going after what she wanted and loved and that there was no more secrecy. I think Betta admired her for that because she was a lesbian and wanted to tell people, but new it would not be accepted. She feared to lose the ones she loved, as Emma through all that she loved away. 

Restless for More

Emma's character showed how much one can desire and still never obtain all their wants. I think it is impossible to not want. The words that were spoken in our first few class discussions made me realize that we know we are alive because we want and we want because we are alive. Nothing was ever good enough for Emma and when she thought something or someone was she would then be left. I feel that she had been fortune for not being able to have a real say in her love life. She did take a stand by having affairs with other men, but ultimately she stay with Charles. Charles satisfied none of her needs and never provided her with any of her wants. 
I think the beggar symbolized Emma immense passion to obtain her desires. A begger is someone who always seeks for something, often because they have nothing. Emma, however, had more than many and a relatively prosperous husband, but she still begged for more. She wanted the life of the wealthy, she wanted a brilliant love life, she wanted no responsibility, but longed to no longer be board. I think that Emma's misfortune was highly related to the circumstances of the time period. It would have been frowned upon to leave your husband as a women, and certainly, divorce was not an option. 
I could not live the life that Emma endured. I would have had affairs too. I like to do things to keep busy, work, read, exercise  socialize, party, etc. and she was often sheltered or restricted. I would go crazy too, because I would get cabin fever being inside my house all the time and being lonely. Charles was a boring companion. They talked about nothing as a couple and they truly had nothing in common. Today, most people could imagine having a marriage and or lifestyle like theirs. 
I believe Emma committed suicide by poison because she wanted Charles to suffer watching her die a slow painful death rather than a quicker method. I think this slow death symbolizes the dreadful life Emma had and the relationship or lack their of that she shared with Charles. She wanted Charles to suffer and not be able to do anything about it, just like she couldn't do anything to exit her marriage. 

Fantastical Fantasy

Madame Bovary also goes by the name Emma, is a dreamer. She always wants something more and her fantasies are more vivid than her reality. Emma believes that she fits in when she goes to the ball at La Vaubyessard; high class, ritzy, and beautifully content. Emma doesn't really know what she wants though because she dreams of what she reads and what she sees when she exits the current life she lives in to enter a new life. Will she find happiness in her never ending search? She's lonely, although she has a husband who adores her. Does he adore her because she puts on this act and never tells Monsieur Bovary how she really feels? Quite possibly. I think that Emma is caught somewhere in the middle of her fantasy and her reality. Today, we can dream of the best love lives, the perfect couple, the ideal relationship, but does that exist? Has it ever? I have notice that my vision of the perfect relationship is a combination of my desires, wants, media, needs, and other societal factors; however, that is not realistic. I think that Emma is stuck in that same rut. She longs for something more; of course, that's only natural. I think she really enjoys talking with Leon because he is similar to her. They are caught up in similar fantasies. We are all dreamers; like we discussed in the very beginning of class, if we do not desire we are not living. 

Bitterness

Upon completing Celestina I realized that some things about love still hold true today. Love is rewarding when everything is okay, but when there is a mere obstacle in the way love can hold painful sorrows. Celestina did not have relationships typical to what I am familiar with. Relationships were solely based on looks and this unknown desire of another person. Today, in my opinion, a relationship might start by a physical attraction, but it is not a relationship if it does not progress into an emotional relationship. Today, we still desire. We wish, hope and dream of all these wonderful fantasies we can share was that one special person. Some people are fortunate enough to experience this with less difficulty while others, like me, find many struggles in having that smooth journey. Life like love is not easy. Both are full of obstacles, challenges and disappointments. When you love someone you stand by their side no matter the obstacles and you hope that when the problem has been overcome you are now a stronger couple. Love can be painful because if you are struggling to overcome those obstacles you hope that the one you love will confide in you, will seek out your support, and look for you to make them feel better. Love can make a person crazy. Sometimes when love feels more of a negative thing than a positive thing you just have to keep in mind that it might just be that moment in time and that you can find happiness and that you will. In Celestina, the love they had for each other was tangled and twisted and drove them to do crazy things. Love also proved that some people will do whatever it takes to be with the one they think they love. How it is that someone can kill themselves over love, but will not save their life to love another? Why is love so powerful? How is something that can be so challenging and difficult be something we seek so much? How do we stay positive when one day everything with love is perfect and the next day it is not? Celestina’s answer was that life ends. Life no longer can go on without love because without love you cannot be happy. Although, sometimes and at this moment I feel like a life without love would be no life at all, I must remember that if that person doesn’t love me the way I can love them then who are they to deserve my love? I have lost a family friend to suicide over a broken heart and as sad as it is to not be strong enough to hold on and carry on, it’s so much harder to think of what those actions had on all those who loved him. Sometimes I am angry towards love. Sometimes I hate that I desire something so difficult. Celestina makes it seem easy that if the one you love is no longer here to just end your life. It seems like it’s the more simple solution, but it’s not. Celestina and this class are making me bitter towards love and makes me hopeless when trying to keep a handle on the struggles that I face in my relationship. 

Fernando de Rojas's "Celestina" (Week One)

Celestina is an interesting book full of illness, love, desire, witchcraft, and religion. Celestina, the main character uses language as a powerful tool to get people to do as they need to profit from them. For example, Celestina has a profound knack for curing illnesses of all sorts. The most common illness is heartache and despair. Today, heartache is not an illness, but back then it was the largest, yet most fatal disease. At one point Parmeno msays, “Then is it madness to love, and I am crazed and have no sense? For if madness truly equaled pain, wailing would never wane.” I thought this was interesting as in previous classes we discussed love being a mental illness. Sometimes I think about how crazy I can be when it comes to someone I care about or even love and I think it could be just that; a mental impairment.

I found it particularly interesting that Celestina had such a way with words that she could get the individuals to desire and need another without even getting the two together. For example, Calisto could not live without Melibea for she is all he longed and desired for, but that had only brief interactions. During those interactions Melibea claimed that he was a crazy person who yelled and hollered things at her. When Celestina went to talk to Melibea about Calisto’s suffering she wanted to hear is name no more. Yet, by act ten, Melibea was asking for Celestina to meet her immediately and remedy a cure. How is it that two people don’t have to have any interactions, but can manage to need each other desperately?

I found it particularly disturbing that Celestina was boasting about being a whore. She also boasted about the fact that women idolized her when I don’t think she was a role model at all. She tricked people into believing that they needed a man or another, even when they said they did not. For example, Parmeno desired Areusa and when Celestina went to talk to her on behalf of Parmeno she practically forced Parmeno in bed with Areusa. Areusa said that she had someone who cared for you her and watched over her, but Celestina was so persistent in getting them in bed together.

I think that Ceslestina is a selfish, awful, dreadful, and dirty woman. She had no regard for other’s wellbeing if she was able to profit from it. I think a lot of it was an act so that she appeared to be something she wasn’t.

The packet reading was also intriguing as I learned quite a bit about prostitution. The author writes, “A Christian woman who lived among the minorities or gave birth to a child of mixed blood was branded ‘bad’ woman who deserved to be flogged or expelled.” I found this in some aspects to be relevant in today’s society. Interracial relationships are frowned upon by some people and to have a mixed baby might be even more of a wrong doing. I think this shows the roots to where our problems with interracial dating might stem from.

Sex was only supposed to be for those who were married, which is very different from today. The majority of people today do not wait until marriage as sexual relations is such a huge aspect of many relationships. I personally could not wait until marriage to find out if the man I loved and I were compatible in bed. That would be torture, because what if the chemistry wasn’t there?! That’s crazy!

Overall, both readings were thought-provoking. The functioning of earlier societies are so different from today, but you get a better understanding as to why some things are the way that they are. 

Troubadour Poetry, Slavoj Žižek, and Buñuel’s “That Obscure Object of Desire”

Troubadour Poetry, Slavoj Žižek, and Buñuel’s “That Obscure Object of Desire”

                A reoccurring theme is present in all that we have read and watched this past week; we desire what we can’t have. Another theme that has been unraveled is this idea that with love there is violence. That in some way we seek love through interrupted violence. From what I get from the readings, movies and discussions; love is a dangerous thing that only mentally disturbed people seek. We as humans, all desire something; however, is it love that we all really desire?

“I bear more pain from love”-Troubadour poetry:

                If we carry negative weight from falling in love then I am starting to believe that we do not know how to define love. Love should be something that feels good and feels right. Of course, with love comes many obstacles because we live in an imperfect world, but with love you can overcome said obstacles and grow stronger. This sense of pain was found in “That Obscure Object of Desire” when the aged man tormented himself with his desire for Conchita. She herself said if she sleeps with him he will not love her any longer. Mathieu’s love for Conchita made him do stupid things because he was ultimately pained when they weren’t together. Mathieu was violent when he finally came to his senses about being teased by Conchita; does violence make you love someone more?

“That Obscure Object of Desire”

                There are two actresses that play the role of Conchita. I see these two actresses as good love and as bad love. The good love actress, for example, comes to see Mathieu at the end of the film to see if he showed how much he loved her by killing himself. However, when they go and have a private discussion the bad love comes out of Conchita and her role changes. She becomes an antagonist. She wants him to beat her in a sense because now she knows how much he cares. She begs for him and his love again, and she tries to return the key so that he can come over anytime he wants. The bad love is the love in which we desire; the love that seems nearly impossible to attain. Slavoj Žižek’s states in his essay, “Lady in courtly love loses concrete features and is addressed as an abstract Ideal” which is how I perceived these two characters; the good and the bad.  Mathieu could not develop concrete features of Conchita because what he desires is so skewed and unattainable. Conchita became an abstract ideal; one moment she blessed Mathieu with beauty and delicacy and the next minute she pained him with rejections and teasing.

                I think that the terrorism was a reoccurring theme in the film because it shows a sense of power and violence. The love Mathieu sought of Conchita was both powerful and violent; however, he did not have the power. Slavoj Žižek says that “We fear more than a Lady who might generously yield to this wish of ours,” and in this case, Conchita did not yield to Mathieu’s desires which led him to fear her absentee almost as much as he feared the terrorism in which he could do nothing about. 

"Song of Songs"-Narcissus-Lacan

For the "Song of Songs":

I first distinguished that a lover and a beloved person, although similar, can be different. A lover can be a person who has either a sexual or romantic relationship with another. A lover can also be a person who is in love which by my definition is a combination of both a sexual and romantic relationship. A person who is beloved might be seen as someone who is dear to one’s heart. “Song of Songs” portrays the love of two individuals; one of a high class and one of a lower class. Vocabulary employs that there is a passionate relationship or desire for one another such as the line, “Pleasing is the fragrance of your perfumes; your name is like perfume poured out.” This line suggests that the name of the King, the man who is loved, is overwhelming. Maybe even to the lady in love, a sexual arousal. The imagery is vivid when reading the “Song of Songs” through the use of the language. For example, the comparison that she says, “My beloved is to me a cluster of henna blossoms from the vineyards of En Gedi.” I envisioned this beautiful scenery, a wonderful place that this love was like.

I think that theology by nature is a bit erotic. Every biblical story has a root of love and desire entwined in it. Commonly, Adam and Eve are discussed and we tend to imagine the love or lust between the two. I feel that without the eroticism we would not be the same as we are now as human beings because we attach everything we do in life with some feeling or some emotion.  Of course, not every story or everything in everyday life is erotic, but typically two people may share that between each other.

For Narcissus:

Narcissus wanted love, yet he rejected all those who loved him. Echo, like the many boys and girls, fell in love with Narcissus. Juno punished Echo for her chattering tongue that tricked Juno and made it so Echo’s voice was strongly limited. Now Echo can still repeat the last words she hears spoken as well as sounds that she hears, but that is it. When Narcissus wandered from his comrades he asked “is anybody here?” Echo repeated, “Here!” Their conversation continued and when it was time, Echo made herself present. Narcissus shooed her away saying that he rather die before he have her touch him. In response, Echo stated to him, “I would have you touch me!” When Narcissus found his reflection in the water it was not him that he loved, it was what he couldn't have. Due to Echo’s pain from the cruel rejection of Narcissus, she we withered away to simply a voice. She now could never be touched. Love is something that is felt emotionally and while there are physical aspects one must be to feel to be in love. Narcissus did not die because he found himself; he died because he said he’d rather die than have Echo touch him. Echo then spent her life lonely, invisible, and in caves.  Narcissus had treated many spirits of the woods and waters the way he treated Echo and one of them decided that he too should fall in love, but be unable to gain the love from that person. Narcissus might not have replied to Echo’s request for love because he thought he was far better than Echo could be; maybe, far too beautiful.

As humans, like Narcissus experiences, we want what we can’t have and when we have something we always want more.  To live is to desire, and without desire one would not live. It is an unfortunate reality that life is this way for all humans, because if we did not want we would not progress, we would not succeed, we would not produce and we certainly would not fall in love. As humans, we need to learn to control our wants and desires to live happily, but not greedily.

For Lacan:

There is a parallel between Narcissus and Lacan’s “The Mirror Stage.” For example, the chimp recognizes it’s reflection before the child. Narcissus recognizes his reflection in the water. The child is playful to the mirror as to try and figure out how to play with his/hers reflection. Narcissus, 16 years old, an adult in this story, but merely a child in today’s world, is playful towards his reflection in the water. The “imago” is the imagined concept of a loved one the remains the same through adulthood. Narcissus saw his beauty, his own perfection that should (would) remain the same throughout the entirety of his life.  When Lacan writes “an image that is seemingly predestined to have an effect” Narcissus realizes the power of reflection. Narcissus exemplifies Lancan’s statement when he explains how the reflection replicates the movement of the individual, but in reverse and feels that the image is animated. Narcissus does this when shedding his tears in the water.  “The jubilant assumption of his specular image by the kind of being” is an example of how Narcissus embraced his image. The word “primordial” is used frequently, and I related this to Narcissus because from the beginning he was “a child with whom one could have fallen in love even in the cradle.” He knew nothing more but to only desire beauty and perfection which as humans is unrealistic. The syntheses (the combining of material and abstract entities), which Narcissus was unable to do: Had Narcissus combined the physical attributes of Echo as well as the abstract thought that she loved him, he would have overcome and found love rather than death.