Before Sunrise challenges the common introduction of two people who fall in love within a matter of hours through conversation. In most relationships (where love follows) it takes time for two people to become comfortable to the idea of what love means to them. The two characters in Before Sunrise met on a train and decided to embark on a brief adventure until Jessie leaves to head back to America. Celine is a European women whose ideas differ from Jessie's sometimes seemingly typical American remarks. Celine and Jessie hit it off from the first conversation and as it progressed we learned many perspectives of love.
One phrase in the movie that caught my attention in particular was when the couple was discussing that as couples grow old they lose the ability to hear each other. I was fascinated by this remark because I look at my Grandparents and I think that they hear each other and understand each other well. I believe that they have many silent conversations. Many people truly believe in a forever with another and that could not be possible or happily if they were unable to hear one another.
I find it intriguing how strangers are so open to confiding in each other when they have never even shared some of what they do with someone that they are close with. Why do we as humans trust someone who we don't know so quickly, but not a friend or family member? I believe that sometimes we do that because we feel we won't be judged or that if we are they won't hold it against us because at the end of the day we won't ever see them again, or so we hope!
The concept of the Jessie and Celine being awake in their dream seemed so true. I believe if the world wasn't such a risky place more people would dare to go on an adventure with a stranger, but give the lack of security we feel from others we are often far more unlikely to do so. The opportunity seems grand to be able to take chance so freely and not worry about the bad from a situation. I think this is an adventure that could tell a life time fully of stories.
Sunday, February 3, 2013
Thursday, January 24, 2013
Annie Hall
Annie Hall was a great comedy in that it hit on many important aspects of love and gender roles. More specifically, I thought it was interesting how Alvy uses a women's menstrual cycle against Annie when she was in a bad mood. Coincidentally, I feel like it is common for issues to arise when a women is on her period, but I don't think its fair for a men to use something against a women that comes naturally and without choice.
I thought it was ironic how Alvy could not get over Annie when in most movies and scenarios it's the other way around. However, I liked this approach because it shows that a man too can have these mixed feelings and emotions as well as a sensitive side. Finding a sensitive side in men is hard to do, unless you're lucky. I think more relationships would be better off and longer lasting if both the man and woman could be more open and honest with each other. I felt like in Annie Hall they addressed their issues with a psychologist, but never with each other. No relationship will work without communication. I truly believe communication is the key to a successful relationship.
I liked how the movie clearly distinguishes the difference between the New York lifestyle and the California lifestyle. In NY you have a cold and almost fridgid mood and in California you had the happy go luck spirit. I think both locations identified with Alvy and Annie and their lifestyles. I thought it was a good way to find better understanding of who each character is.
Overall, this movie was effective in showing that relationships are still similar today as they were in the 70s. It shows how even though so much changes in time, but human characteristic remain similar in some aspects throughout generations.
I thought it was ironic how Alvy could not get over Annie when in most movies and scenarios it's the other way around. However, I liked this approach because it shows that a man too can have these mixed feelings and emotions as well as a sensitive side. Finding a sensitive side in men is hard to do, unless you're lucky. I think more relationships would be better off and longer lasting if both the man and woman could be more open and honest with each other. I felt like in Annie Hall they addressed their issues with a psychologist, but never with each other. No relationship will work without communication. I truly believe communication is the key to a successful relationship.
I liked how the movie clearly distinguishes the difference between the New York lifestyle and the California lifestyle. In NY you have a cold and almost fridgid mood and in California you had the happy go luck spirit. I think both locations identified with Alvy and Annie and their lifestyles. I thought it was a good way to find better understanding of who each character is.
Overall, this movie was effective in showing that relationships are still similar today as they were in the 70s. It shows how even though so much changes in time, but human characteristic remain similar in some aspects throughout generations.
Tuesday, December 4, 2012
Kissing Jessica Stein & Readings !
First off, I want to talk about the article from CNN.com, "The Mythical 'War on Men'" by Michael Kimmel! This article discussed the killed relationship between the sexes from author Suzanne Venker who is adamant in believing that men are the cause of women's unhappiness. Kimmel writes his piece with the belief that men can be equal partners, coworkers, colleagues, and parents. The final line of Kimmel's article says, "We want it all also- - and the only way we can have it all is to halve it all." This statement utters the simple truth that many of us forget; relationships take two people and regardless of the sex, both people have wants and needs that are capable of being equal if that is what they desire.
There can be negative stigmas attached to a male and female relationship in that the man doesn't always carry his own weight, or women are meant to be in the kitchen while the men are bringing home the dough and working out in the yard and on their toys, but this is in fact not every scenario. We associate males and females in a way that we were taught from when we were young; the 50's version of the American dream, but news flash, it's almost 2013!
Although many relationships do fit this stigma, many relationships are successful while being what we may consider "non-traditional." Have you thought of the dad being a stay at home dad? Or the mom bringing home the paycheck? What about a family with no kids at all? Or even more, a same sex relationship? What about a same sex relationship with children? There are so many possibilities to both the heterosexual and homosexual relationships these days that it is almost hard to even put a stigma or stereotype to it.
I suppose that my thoughts on relationships is that it is possible for both people in a relationship to be happy, if they are both putting in the effort and both offering what each other needs whether its financially, emotionally, or sexually.
With that in mind, Kissing Jessica Stein is a great way to express how different people need different things in a relationship and that if both people are willing to help the other with their needs then the relationship might dissolve into a friendship or even worse no friendship at all. Helen was a sexually driven person, while Jessica was a confused person who happened to have bad luck in love and decided that maybe, just maybe she wasn't attracted to the opposite sex, but the same sex. Their relationship as Helen puts it is a friendship, they are simply best friends and by their break-up Jessica puts their relationship into perspective by saying to another character that she just wasn't gay enough for Helen. Both of these women brought something to the table, but what they were bringing did not meet what each other needed; therefore, the relationship end, but they were fortunate to remain really close friends.
Julia Kristeva puts love bluntly in her piece, "In Praise of Love" by stating, "love never dwells in us without burning us." With every love, there is the inevitable chance of hurt--that might not mean the relationship dissolved, but maybe that there was a harsh argument or a disappointment; however, whatever the case may be love brings us this burning sensation. Often times we say we have butterflies or these un-explainable feelings inside our stomach when we think of that special other, but can't it be true that we feel the burning too? Here's the thing, we must take that chance to fall in love because it's natural to desire another person, to want a relationship (maybe even like one listed above), maybe to just step outside of our comfort zone and take an adventurous risk. Without risk there would be know desire; there would be no love. Kristeva sums up my thoughts for today, "Within love, a risk that might otherwise be tragic is accepted, normalized, [and] made fully reassuring."
There can be negative stigmas attached to a male and female relationship in that the man doesn't always carry his own weight, or women are meant to be in the kitchen while the men are bringing home the dough and working out in the yard and on their toys, but this is in fact not every scenario. We associate males and females in a way that we were taught from when we were young; the 50's version of the American dream, but news flash, it's almost 2013!
Although many relationships do fit this stigma, many relationships are successful while being what we may consider "non-traditional." Have you thought of the dad being a stay at home dad? Or the mom bringing home the paycheck? What about a family with no kids at all? Or even more, a same sex relationship? What about a same sex relationship with children? There are so many possibilities to both the heterosexual and homosexual relationships these days that it is almost hard to even put a stigma or stereotype to it.
I suppose that my thoughts on relationships is that it is possible for both people in a relationship to be happy, if they are both putting in the effort and both offering what each other needs whether its financially, emotionally, or sexually.
With that in mind, Kissing Jessica Stein is a great way to express how different people need different things in a relationship and that if both people are willing to help the other with their needs then the relationship might dissolve into a friendship or even worse no friendship at all. Helen was a sexually driven person, while Jessica was a confused person who happened to have bad luck in love and decided that maybe, just maybe she wasn't attracted to the opposite sex, but the same sex. Their relationship as Helen puts it is a friendship, they are simply best friends and by their break-up Jessica puts their relationship into perspective by saying to another character that she just wasn't gay enough for Helen. Both of these women brought something to the table, but what they were bringing did not meet what each other needed; therefore, the relationship end, but they were fortunate to remain really close friends.
Julia Kristeva puts love bluntly in her piece, "In Praise of Love" by stating, "love never dwells in us without burning us." With every love, there is the inevitable chance of hurt--that might not mean the relationship dissolved, but maybe that there was a harsh argument or a disappointment; however, whatever the case may be love brings us this burning sensation. Often times we say we have butterflies or these un-explainable feelings inside our stomach when we think of that special other, but can't it be true that we feel the burning too? Here's the thing, we must take that chance to fall in love because it's natural to desire another person, to want a relationship (maybe even like one listed above), maybe to just step outside of our comfort zone and take an adventurous risk. Without risk there would be know desire; there would be no love. Kristeva sums up my thoughts for today, "Within love, a risk that might otherwise be tragic is accepted, normalized, [and] made fully reassuring."
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Simple Passion
Annie Ernaux's auto-fiction "Simple Passion" has nothing "simple" about it. The chapter read for this week's class brings love and desire further to light, but also explores the idea of obsession. We desire things or people that we want then we fall in love with those things or people. Doesn't it happen that many times a relationship turns into a sort of obsession? Maybe some people would rather refer to it as a routine, but in reality in a relationship we often become obsessed with the other person. Once we commit to someone suddenly all our thoughts somehow return to what that person would think, want, need or do. We are obsessed with looking for that next text, phone call or FaceBook status from our significant other. Some people, take obsession to a whole other level life Anie Ernaux. Ernaux talks about the unbelievable pleasure A brings her sexually, but its more than eroticism attached with Ernaux's feelings. She almost idolizes A, what he wears, how he acts, how he moves or stumbles...its the every little gesture that one might typically overlook. Ernaux is stuck in this time freeze, in my opinion, everything is in slow motion as she waits for Mr. Right to think or feel even a partial of what she feels for him. Why does she wait for this man? She must be able to find someone else or there must be someone else who certainly wants her, but I guess that's just it...we want what we can't have! If he reciprocated the entire time would she still want him? Would the passion be just that simple or would it no longer exist? Ernaux feels the voids in her life by shopping for specialty clothing, items and lingerie with the idea that she will meet this man once more. It is very typical to try and replace voids with material items, but that won't ever actually fill that void completely.
Monday, November 19, 2012
I'll Make Love To You- Boyz II Men
Boyz II Men: I'll Make Love To You
Close your eyes, make a wishAnd blow out the candlelightFor tonight is just your nightWe're gonna celebrate all through the night
Pour the wine, light the fireGirl, your wish is my commandI submit to your demandsI will do anything, girl, you need only ask
I'll make love 2 you like you want me toAnd I'll hold you tight, baby, all through the nightI'll make love 2 you when you want me toAnd I will not let go 'til you tell me to
Girl relax, let's go slowI ain't got nowhere to goI'm just gonna concentrate on youGirl, are you ready? It's gonna be a long night
Throw your clothes on the floorI'm gonna take my clothes off tooI made plans to be with youGirl, whatever you ask me, you know I will do
I'll make love 2 you like you want me toAnd I'll hold you tight, baby, all through the nightI'll make love 2 you when you want me toAnd I will not let go 'til you tell me to
Baby, tonight is your nightAnd I will do you rightJust make a wish on your nightAnything that you askI will give you the love of your life
I'll make love 2 you like you want me to(I'll make love)And I'll hold you tight, baby, all through the night(Hold you tight)I'll make love 2 you when you want me to(I'll make love)And I will not let go 'til you tell me to
I'll make love 2 you like you want me to(I'll make love)And I'll hold you tight, baby, all through the night(Hold you tight)I'll make love 2 you when you want me to(I'll make love)And I will not let go 'til you tell me to
This is not my only favorite love song, but I love this song because it's about a guy pleasing a woman unconditionally. I think a guy should go out of his way to make his woman feel amazing. I thought of Celestina when listening to this song more recently because the guy would do anything to be with Malibea. Part of healthy love is having the romance alive and this is a good song for a guy who wants to treat his lady right! :)
Monday, November 12, 2012
Karma: The Bad Girl Part II
Ricardo was an intelligent man, but also very stupid too. He was blinded by the “love” of the Bad Girl. Through thirty some years the Bad Girl had entered and exited Ricardo's life dramatically. The Bad Girl was deserving of no name other than just that, the Bad Girl. She deceitful, cruel, and cold, yet Ricardo loved her. Why did he love her so much? Ricardo loved her because she never loved him the way he loved her; the way he wanted her to love him. Ricardo wanted to win the game, the trophy being that he won't the Bad Girl's love once and for all. At the end of the story Ricardo and the Bad Girl were together in their later years; some might say that he finally won and captured what he had desired his whole life, but I don't see it that way.
The Bad Girl treated people cruelly and believed, like I said last week that happiness could only come from money. She stole, deceived, and betrayed many people. I truly feel that she had no feelings and she certainly could not be remorseful. She was a manipulator which enabled her to be the thief that she was, both of money and of heart. She was always greedy from the beginning of the novel and she was also selfish. She sought out men who would be vulnerable to her lies and open to her fabricated stories of the many lives she lived.
Karma is a powerful term that many people refer to in today's society. We also think of the phrase "what goes around comes around". Karma is what determines a person’s fate. We constantly are made aware of our actions for just this reason. We hope, as humans, that if we do well in return good will be done to us. When we do badly, we often see that our fortune, connections or relationships are not as good as they could be. I would never wish harm or poor health upon any person, in real life or in a book, but as I see it, the cancer determined the fate of her actions.
I also believe that her reasoning in seeing Ricardo at the end was for purely selfish reasons. She knew she destroyed the man, closest in age, who loved her tremendously regardless of all her wrong doings. Ricardo, in my opinion, had much insecurity. At the end, he did take the Bad Girl back, but he knew it wouldn’t be for long; however, this time when she left it would be the last, it would be final. At this point, Ricardo had lost her so many times that this final time would almost be a relief to him.
I don’t feel that Ricardo had very good luck. I think that he was a good person who had been handed a bad deck of cards when it came to the game of love. Everyone has some heartache and pain, but I felt that even when Ricardo tried to rid the Bad Girl of his mind she some how reunited herself with him; whether it was on purpose or by coincidence.
The Bad Girl treated people cruelly and believed, like I said last week that happiness could only come from money. She stole, deceived, and betrayed many people. I truly feel that she had no feelings and she certainly could not be remorseful. She was a manipulator which enabled her to be the thief that she was, both of money and of heart. She was always greedy from the beginning of the novel and she was also selfish. She sought out men who would be vulnerable to her lies and open to her fabricated stories of the many lives she lived.
Karma is a powerful term that many people refer to in today's society. We also think of the phrase "what goes around comes around". Karma is what determines a person’s fate. We constantly are made aware of our actions for just this reason. We hope, as humans, that if we do well in return good will be done to us. When we do badly, we often see that our fortune, connections or relationships are not as good as they could be. I would never wish harm or poor health upon any person, in real life or in a book, but as I see it, the cancer determined the fate of her actions.
I also believe that her reasoning in seeing Ricardo at the end was for purely selfish reasons. She knew she destroyed the man, closest in age, who loved her tremendously regardless of all her wrong doings. Ricardo, in my opinion, had much insecurity. At the end, he did take the Bad Girl back, but he knew it wouldn’t be for long; however, this time when she left it would be the last, it would be final. At this point, Ricardo had lost her so many times that this final time would almost be a relief to him.
I don’t feel that Ricardo had very good luck. I think that he was a good person who had been handed a bad deck of cards when it came to the game of love. Everyone has some heartache and pain, but I felt that even when Ricardo tried to rid the Bad Girl of his mind she some how reunited herself with him; whether it was on purpose or by coincidence.
Tuesday, November 6, 2012
The Honest Truth: "The Bad Girl"
The Bad Girl is a continuation of what we are learning in class about love and desire. The main character Ricardito has dreams of living in France for all is life. These dreams began when he was young and an orphan cared for by his Aunt Alberta. From his young days in Lima to his current days in Paris, Ricardito had love for this mysterious girl; the "Bad Girl". The Bad Girl was known as the Chilean girl, then guerrilla fighter, and then Madam Arnoux. As Madam Arnoux, the Bad Girl lived a suitable lifestyle. She traveled, had a love affair, got to wear fancy clothes, and go to A-list parties. She desired a life of wealth, fancy and fashion. Ricardito loves her from the first day he met her, and every time after that he had a bizarre run in with her just by coincidence. The Bad Girl was a liar and would do anything get ahead no matter the feelings others had to sacrifice. Ricardito never stopped thinking about her and he would tell her all sorts of romantic things yet she would blame him that the reason they weren't married was because he was a coward. In one discussion, the Bad Girl said, "Happiness, I don't know ad I don't care what it is, Ricardito. What I
am sure about is that it isn't the romantic, vulgar thing it is for you.
Money gives you security, it protects you, it lets you enjoy life
thoroughly and not worry about tomorrow. It's the only happiness you can
touch." The concept of money buying happines is something we have briefly touched upon in class, but have not spent a whole lot of time discussing. In the Bad Girls mind, this is the ultimate way to achieve happiness. I believe she knows the difference between happiness and love and she could care less if she loved the man she was with as long as he was wealthy and could lavish and spoil her. She knew she would continue to have love affairs until and even after she found that wealthy companion. Following her brief statement about happiness she said, "I'll never be satisfied with what I have. I'll always want more." This speaks to how humans naturally desire more and more...for if we do not desire we would not live. The Bad Girl is blunt in speaking about such desires. She wants to travel, dress fancy, go to plays and live an extravagant lifestyle all of which Ricardito could not afford. Ricardito desires to care for her in ways that are nowhere similar to the Bad Girl's fantasies. I believe that the Bad Girl is a bad person, an obviously unfaithful person, a liar and a deviant. She doesn't fit the role of a wife, but more of a whore. There is no game of love with her, its a game of money and fortune...Just as it was when she stole Monsieur Arnoux's money out of his Switzerland account and disappeared into the unknown on her next adventure to win big.
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